New Iraqi Jobs Program
No small task, or cost…
It is being reported that President Bush’s new Iraqi Jobs Program initiative is going to cost American taxpayers about $1 Billion dollars. Upon hearing this my first thought was, why haven’t we had an American Jobs Program initiative from this President in the last six years?
I was checking out at the grocery store while thinking of this, so I asked the bagger–Jim, according to his name tag–after assuring he was using paper instead of plastic what his thoughts were about it. He mumbled something under his breath which I won’t publish on this child-friendly web site, threw my bag of Garbanzo beans at me and stormed off; leaving the rest of my groceries scattered over the end of the register counter.
At first I was upset about that, but then the kind young lady who was now forced to be cashier and bagger–I wonder if she gets double time for that?–informed me that I shouldn’t take it personally. Apparently Jim was having a bad day and very depressed that his Engineering degree was nothing more than a collection space for cobwebs on his wall.
That’s certainly not my fault or problem, but I’m not a heartless jerk–so I asked the manager to take that into consideration when firing Jim for his tirade and suggested he at least offer him a warm letter of recommendation.
Back at home I began pondering the Billion dollars that was going to be needed to pay for this Iraqi Jobs Program again while scanning my favorite daily news sites and it came to me in a flash. How we could easily pay for this program, it was brilliant! Actually, I should note that the state leaders in New Hampshire deserve some credit for the idea because it was their creative revenue raising which sparked it for me.
You see, in New Hampshire they’ve decided that just forcing people to pay taxes on the property they own wasn’t generating enough money for the state, so now in addition to paying a yearly tax on property you own, you also have to pay a tax for the view you get from that property as well. A “view tax”, it’s beautiful…and the more so–the more expensive.
How effective can such a tax be? Well, in one man’s case, Mr. Bischoff’s cabin and outhouse which had been valued at $43,000 was raised all the way up to $243,000 for his fine view of hills and trees in the distance. That’s a $200,000 view, for the government. I’m not sure if Mr. Bischoff is as excited about the view as the state.
Sure, as with any tax there are some oddities which exist. For instance, one blind man is taxed on a $45,000 view he can’t see. But hey, America isn’t Utopia, it is America and we must all pay our fair share–whatever that’s decided for us to be.
So, how does this pertain to the Iraqi Jobs Program? Simple, I think the federal government should enact a “Favorite Flavors Tax”. It would work like this, every restaurant and food/fast-food joint in the country would have to determine their most popular dish or product, and the Favorite Flavors Tax–at a rate of 0.05%–would then be applied to just that one item per establishment from now on.
Who’s going to complain over an extra few pennies for McDonald’s French Fries or another quarter for a Starbuck’s Mocha-latte? If you’re already willing to pay $5 for a cup of coffee, you can certainly afford to pay $5.25. And then you’ll sleep better (after the caffeine rush) knowing that you’ve helped put some Iraqi citizen to work… in Iraq… so that he or she can be productive… for Iraq… and contribute to the economy him or herself… in Iraq.
So, how about it my fellow patriots, let’s all start buying American again and put Iraq to work.
Image source: whitehouse.gov
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